Wednesday, January 2, 2013

My 2012 Nicknames for Thailand's Opposition Party

As we get into the new year, I'm thinking (and hoping) the blog might attract some new readers.  Folks who haven't been here the past couple of years and don't know that posts filled with nothing but silly insults are par for the course.

In fact, I'd like to think those posts are my strong point.

Last week the Bangkok Post reported some other insults on the current Thai government, the prime minister and some cabinet ministers by the Government House reporters.  It is a tradition for these reporters at the end of the year to give invented names to describe their subjects’ characters and flaws.  

So in an effort to promote political fairness, I have come up with some nicknames for the main opposition party and their MPs and friends.

Disclaimers:  I don't know any of these people personally, so if any of my chosen nicknames are their actual nicknames, it's purely coincidental.  Also, I am unsure of exact name pronunciations, so if I botched any in an attempt at humor, mea culpa.

That's another thing you newbies need to know about this blog:  Botching things in the name of humor is my other strong point.

I have dubbed the Democratic Party the "Biggest Loser" Party. No surprise there. They haven’t won a national election in over 20 years. They even lost big in the government’s no-confidence vote held in late November.  Their arch nemesis, Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra, easily won her no-confidence vote in the lower house 308 – 159. The other three ministers in Yingluck’s cabinet also had no problem winning their no-confidence votes.

And if you’re looking for reasons why the Democrat Party loses all the time, all you need to do is look at their roster.

Democrat Party MP “Nasty Nat” Bantadtan, son of Democrat party-list MP and executive Banyat Bantadtan.  You may remember him.  He was caught watching porn on his iPhone while Parliament was in session and was blamed for accidentally causing the image of a woman in a provocative pose to be flashed across the giant monitors in the Parliament.  In typical Democrat Party style, he tried to weasel out of it with some pathetic excuse but nobody with any brain power at all believed him.

Sorry - I had to pixelate some of this photo to maintain this site's decency
Democrat Party MP Boonyod “Swastika Joe” Sukthinthai. On May 2nd during another session in Parliament, he goose stepped up to the front speaker’s podium, gave the Nazi salute and screamed “Heil Hitler” at the top of his lungs. 

Democrat Party MP Thani “the Bangkok Strangler” Thaugsuban. The Democrats often speak about the importance of “rule of law” but rarely practice it. On May 31, 2012, the Democrat MPs went crazy ass bonkers in Parliament again and MP Thani Thaugsuban went for the throat – the throat of political rival, Pheu Thai MP Jirayu Huangsap.

Democrat MP Thani Thaugsuban trying to choke the life out of PT MP Jirayu Huangsap

It is interesting to note that in this wider image we happen to see none other than “Swastika Joe” in the gray suit (upper left hand corner) attempting to get into the action. 

Goose-steppers of a feather flock together” and it’s time to tell the Democrat Party to get the ‘flock’ out of Parliament.

I don’t see fellow Democrat MP “Nasty Nat” in the picture. He must be in the back of the room “attending to his caucus” – if you know what I mean.

Democrat Party MP Suthep “Murder Defendent” Thaugsuban.  Homicidal maniacs evidently run in the Thaugsuban family.  Thani gets his thrills with the “hands on approach” of strangling his victims. His brother and former Deputy PM, Suthep prefers ordering the army to do his killing for him.  As a result of his murderous rampage in the 2010 pro-democracy protests, murder and attempted murder charges against Suthep were officially filed last month.

Democrat Party MP Abhisit “Prime Suspect” Vejjajiva.  Abhisit was a Prime Minister.  Now he’s a Prime Suspect in the same atrocities that his former Deputy PM Suthep has been charged with. Abhisit has been charged as well.

Abhisit and Suthep - looking guilty as charged.

Special Bonus Nickname:

Channel 7 Reporter Somjit “Abhisit’s Lap Dog” Nawakruasunthorn.  Although not a Democrat Party MP, Somjit does work hard for her master, Abhisit Vejjajiva. When she’s not writing propaganda books promoting Abhisit and other Democrat MPs, she’s using her job as a television news reporter to harass his political opponents (see here and here).

Abhisit has been trying to train her for years now. This 2009 video clip shows Abhisit training Somjit to obey orders and walk on two legs.  You can clearly see she is having difficulties.

Thailand needs more democracy and less Democrats. We should all look forward to 2013. 

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